Lips Forming Words

I think I'd better have a little something
I think I'd like to have a little something

     Of interesting note I just realized that "under construction" in French is "rapide erection." French always reminds me as high school, the reason for that being that high school is likely the only place I will ever have call to use French. I took four years of French in high school. Off the top of my head I can remember two sentences. One is to order a steak. The other is not one I can repeat in front of my mother. It is also the one I was taught by my eighth grade French teacher.

     That ambling train of though was brought to you by following a train of links from the Crash Test Dummies website where I double-checked the lyrics above. None of it has anything to do with what I originally meant to write about.

     I suppose I am feeling a little forgotten. Certainly not by my family, they are as wonderful as ever. And I recently received an email from my friend Sarah to which I admit a failure to respond. Come to think of it, perhaps that is my problem. I seem to continually approach those who are giving me no response and not responding to those who approach me.

     How often in life are we being handed that which we seek only to ignore it?

     But then maybe I am still too tired. It has only been four and a half months since her and I split. Where am I supposed to be now? I have never cried about it. I tell myself I did all my crying before hand, in the months leading up to the final dissolution, but I am not certain that is wholly accurate. I have had children to take care of, and I do not really feel like looking back over the past to muster the emotion needed to cry. My life has changed since I was last single, and I am not sure how to balance these needs. I was given some movie passes for Christmas and an offer to baby-sit so I could use them. I do not even have a clue who I would use them with. I do not feel I know anyone around here anymore.

     I need some air.

     I need some interaction. Some interaction where I can see a face, watch the nuances in lips forming words. I do not want to just read text or listen to sound; I want to hear body language. I want to see pupils dilate, a face lean close, a throat swallow and a tongue wet dry lips. I want to inspire and be mused. I need something for myself again.

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